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Posts Tagged ‘First Move’

How to have a healthy relationship

August 16th, 2010 Jeanette No comments

Relationships are like plants. They need to be nurtured with love, care and understanding. Those who take relationships for granted pay a heavy price for their casual approach.

The best relationships are those that are built on respect, commitment and fulfillment, not to forget communication. In fact, good communication is the foundation stone of any healthy relationship.

You must learn to share your thoughts and feelings with your partner, even if they are unpleasant. Very often the fear of offending your partner makes you keep quiet, and suffer in silence. You are not only doing an injustice to yourself but also sowing unhappiness.

You must also trust each other. Suspicion breeds hate, jealousy and sorrow. Often, these feelings get out of control, and destroy relationships. The best way to keep the flame of trust shining bright is to confide in your partner. It removes mistrust, and does not allow misunderstandings to grow.

It also pays to be honest with each other. Dont hesitate to brush unpleasant issues under the carpet. If you have done a wrong, let your partner know. You will feel stronger to face the next challenge.

Being a part of the couple should not affect the sense of oneself. Establishing boundaries where needed helps maintain a balanced relationship. Love brings along many expectations that need to be met. Every partner expects something out of the other. But it is only when expectations are realistic and both the partners are able to meet them equitably that life is happy and content.

There are three stages in every relationship. The first is attraction. When you are attracted to a person, you wish to know more about him, his likes, dislikes, interests etc. Then you gather courage to make your first move like asking to come for a movie, dance or dinner.

The second is the testing stage. This is the stage when the relationship starts blooming. If you hide facts at this stage, or spread a web of lies, then you can be sure that the relationship will end in heartbreak.

The third is the conflict stage. As the relationship progresses, there will be conflicts and disagreements. Those who are able to handle these conflicts with trust and equanimity are able to keep the relationship going; the others simply flounder. So, learn to handle conflicts.

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Should You Try Getting Over A Relationship Or Put Your Energy Into Getting Your Ex Back

May 1st, 2010 Jeanette No comments

When we split from a lover, we can either try getting over a relationship or try getting them back. It obviously depends on whether you still love your ex as to which one you chose.

If you do want your ex back, you need to make every attempt to achieve this. You and only you know whether he or she makes you happy and would make your life complete. Your family and friends may try to advise you but remember that they are not impartial. They love you and hopefully want what is best for you but sometimes people act with their own interests in mind.

If your friends are all single, they may have been jealous of your love affair and would prefer to keep you single. If they didnt like your partner, they are not going to encourage you to get him/her back.

Couples, as we know, break up for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes there is no coming back from the split and you have to accept it. Often especially if it was caused by something trivial or a misunderstanding, you could salvage things if only one of you would swallow their pride and initiate contact. Usually this will have to be the man as society still thinks it is the man who should do the chasing. A woman who makes the first move can be seen as being desperate.

Examine your own feelings before you decide which option to choose. Do you want to get back with your ex, to dump them so they know how it feels? These are games for teenagers to play so if that is your motivation, do yourself a favour and move on. But if you really do believe this person to be your soul mate, you need to plan a way to get them back in your life.

Try enlisting the help of their family and friends. Now there is a fine line between asking for help and becoming a stalker so take it slowly. Just happen to be at the places these people hang out i.e. bump into them by accident and see how ms/mr ex is doing. Make sure you are looking good so that the reports back are favourable. If you havent slept for days, plaster on the makeup. You do not want it going back to your lover that you looked miserable and suicidal.

You could always try the direct approach and contact your former partner. Ask them out for a friendly drink or meal and see where it goes. You never know they could have been dying to make contact but were afraid that you would not entertain them. People are funny creatures they will often let fear of the unknown hinder their future happiness.

Whatever you decide, remember that we only get one shot at life. It is not a dress rehearsal. Getting over a relationship or getting back with your ex are both achievable, the question is which one do you want to succeed at?

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Dating Tips for Christian Singles

February 25th, 2010 Jeanette No comments

There are thousands of people all over the world who are looking for that special someone, but if you are art of a Christian singles network, it still may be hard to find that right person that will click with you. First of all, you will want to keep in mind that when you are participating in Christian dating online, you may not get responses to your profile right away or, at all. What you need to do is follow these few Christian dating tips in order to get your perfect match.

First, you will want to make the first move. You cannot expect anyone else to make the first move if you don’t. It doesn’t take much time or effort to approach someone through email or chat on a Christian singles site. Just go ahead and don’t be shy! If you are, you will not get anywhere with online dating. But watch out about coming on too strong in your messages. Many people do not like to hear about the wedding plans you have for them already; take it slow and be natural in your conversations.

If you want a reason to contact someone other than the fact that you are interested in getting to know them better, you can always send them a message on their birthday. This is a fun, easy way to break the ice, and you don’t have to worry if you do not get a response back.

It is also best to personalize your message. If you are telling them that you like something about their profile, relate it to yourself. They like skiing in the mountains? Tell them about the fun you had on your last skiing trip. This will show genuine interest in getting to know the person as a friend, rather than just jumping right into talk about a serious relationship.

Another great tips for Christian singles is to involve the Lord into your message to meet new people. You are all their for one reason, and it is to find people that you can easily talk to about your religious beliefs and know that they feel the same way. This also extends to the rest of your conversation; as a representative of Christ, you should be respectful in what your write and avoid using foul language and inappropriate subjects when you are contacting another member of the site, especially the first time.

It is also best to not reveal too much about yourself on your profile. If your life really is an open book, you can share as much as you want, but be aware that anyone on the site can see it. If you are a little mysterious, you may get more attention. Pictures are really important for your profile, because you want to represent yourself honestly. You also want to get attention from others who are searching through profiles. Those as do not include a picture will never get as much attention as those who honestly represent themselves in their words and pictures.

Jordan Mcpelt is a professional author who specializes in Christian Dating and Online Christian Dating. For more information on Christian Personals please visit http://www.christianmingle.com

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Dating Tips for Christian Singles

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