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Specific Actions You Can Take To Save A Relationship

March 17th, 2010 beckywilson No comments

Relationships have a way to going south suddenly. Things can be going great for a long period of time, but slowly small issues start to appear. Before you know it, these small issues have become major issues that threaten the survival of the relationship all together.

Thankfully, there are 4 steps on how to save a relationship that anyone can use to great effect.

How to Save a Relationship – Take an Honest Look at the Relationship

The first thing you need to do is truly assess the relationship. Has it run its course? Are you and your partner ready to move on? Is it worth saving? Do you still love your partner? Was the relationship a good one?

These are all questions you should ask yourself before you go any further. Many times people will try to save a relationship as a knee jerk reaction – even if it would be better to move on. By making this honest assessment of the relationship, you can avoid the heartache and hassles associated with trying to rescue a bad relationship.

What Problems are You Facing?

If you’ve decided to rescue the relationship, the next step is to determine what the actual problems are. It is easy to take the issues that appear on the surface and say that they are the problems. However, many times the most obvious problems are only a symptom of other underlying issues.

If you and your significant other are still together, work with each other to find out what is truly taking its toll on the relationship. This will require the two of you to sit down and talk honestly about your perspectives. When you do so, remember that what you are hearing is a person’s perspective. What they say may not be exactly how events took place (or how you perceived them to have taken place), but it is the way that they interpreted them. Accept what they have to say and explain your perspective if it differs from theirs.

Many times the issues you two face come down to a simple misunderstanding that one of you is secretly angry about.

Address the Issues in Your Relationship

The next step is obvious – address the issue or issues. Make a specific plan of action and stick to it. Aside from figuring out the real issues, this can be the hardest part. Sometimes it will require you and your partner to change behaviors and habits that you enjoy. This sacrifice may be necessary for saving the relationship.

How to Save a Relationship Permanently – Continue to Grow

Finally, work to keep the relationship growing. It is easy to get stuck in the normalcy of routine. Remember that a relationship that isn’t growing is dying. This is something that both you and your partner are going to have to work at continuously. However, the rewards of a healthy relationship are definitely worth the extra effort.

Get the free relationship advice you need for discovering how to save a relationship.

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Tiger: Can He Win Elin Back?

March 15th, 2010 beckywilson No comments

It seems as though everyday there is a new sex scandal amongst the celebrities, and Tiger Woods is right at the top of the list. This is no Britney Spears, Paris Hilton or Dennis Rodman scandal, no, Tiger has raised the bar to a new level. (pun intended)

This is not only about cheating, it’s about repeated acts of betrayal with at least 10 woman, (or thereabouts) building his schedule around constant lies to fly under the radar and utter disregard and zero respect for his wife Elin. (who herself is a drop dead gorgeous glamour) This scandal sets a new benchmark, and Tiger can add a new title to his many world records – douche bag of the decade!
How can such a meek and mild mannered gentleman not only deceive his wife and family, but the many, many of aspiring sportsmen and women who look up to him – and we all thought we could trust you Mr. Woods!

One group who are loving the dirt is the media, what a wind fall, and it seems that Tiger’s midnight tip toeing around under the cover of darkness continues to fuel the paparazzi frenzy who have been handed the scandal to top all scandals which seems to keep hotting up day after day. So what about the broken marriage of Tiger and Elin? can he win her back? Here’s some tips just for Tiger on how to get Elin back.

Tiger, stop thinking about yourself! did you ever think to include Elin in your sexcapades? “Tiger, next time you decide to wonder off under the cover of darkness, take your wife with you don’t be so selfish!”

Nothing beats experience. At least that’s Tigers philosophy so it seems. In 2007 AND in 2009, porn star Joslyn James revealed that Tiger impregnated her. The inside gossip is that Elin feels a little intimidated because of Ms James’s sexual experience. There you go again Tiger: me me me me!! Next time bring Joslyn home so she can show Elin a few tricks too.

Take out your cheque book. Industry sources tell us that Elin is to receive 20 million dollars in accordance with the prenuptial agreement. Rumor also has it that Tiger was set to become the highest ever paid sports star looking to gross more than a billion dollars. Tiger, you can’t continue to keep breaking milestones, just write her a cheque for a few hundred million. It beats Elin’s previous income when she was a nanny.

Tell Elin that no matter what has happened in the past, and through all the lies, deception and sex, you were thinking about her the whole time.

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How to Start Recovering from a Broken Heart

March 14th, 2010 Jeanette No comments

If your heart is breaking because of lost love, if you’ve been betrayed, abandoned, “dumped”, or you know you must leave a relationship because of abuse, you certainly are not alone. Relationships coming to an end is common. Even if we look only at divorce rates, “50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second, and 74% of third marriages end in divorce”. Countless other romantic relationships end every moment of every day and in most cases, someone feels despair and heart break.

So, what to do? The answer is: (1) take care of your physical and emotional self, (2) take additional care of your emotional self by repeating over and over again, “I will get through this and feel better”, and (3) start working on acceptance of the loss. This article will present the details of these three steps so you can start your recovery from heart break today.

Move your body.

In case it is not obvious why this is a recommendation, let me note that no less than the US Surgeon General reported an association between physical exercise and a sense of psychological well-being. Regular exercise increases physical and emotional tolerance of stressful events. Moving your body will help fight off feelings associated with anxiety and depression.

Eat well.

After a relationship ends you might feel like overeating, like not eating at all, or like binging on “high sugar” foods (for example, ice cream and chocolate). The goal of the advice “eat well” is to eat healthy foods in moderate quantities despite not wanting to eat or wanting to do nothing but eat. Healthy eating is consistent with the advice of Micheal Pollan (author of In Defense of Food and The Omnivore’s Dilemma): “Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.”

Avoid self-medicating with alcohol or drugs.

This is stating the obvious. I hope you are not learning here that alcohol and drugs do not solve any problems and often compound any problems you do have. As tempting as numbing your self to pain through alcohol and drugs may be, avoid giving into temptation. Doing otherwise will, 99 times out of 100, just slow down your recovery.

Rest through sleeping enough.

Getting adequate sleep is critical to maintain your resilience in the face of stress. In the book, Making a Good Brain Great, the author Daniel G. Amen notes that “getting less than six and a half hours of sleep at night decreases our ability to fight stress”.

Seek the support of a network of friends.

In the book, Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers: A Guide to Stress, Stress-Related Diseases, and Coping, author Robert M. Sapolsky carefully distinguishes between relationships with supportive friends and relationships with everyone else. Regular contact with supportive friends and family members can reduce the harm caused by stress. Contact with friends or others who are not supportive does not reduce the harm caused by stress and may make things worse.

Repeat over and over again to your self: “I will get through this and feel better”.

If you have never been through a breakup before, tell your self this based on faith and your observation that others, perhaps even close friends of yours, survive breakups and soon start feeling much better. If you have been through a breakup before, remember the experience from the first moments of loss through your transition to feeling better and presumably to being “in love” again. You should find comfort in knowing that you will get through your heart break and despair to feeling better. In many ways, getting through a breakup is a kind of surviving – you can do it, you will get through it to better times.

Start working on acceptance of your loss.

This is the third priority in the self care portion of your recovery for a reason: it is less important than taking care of your physical and emotional self. At the same time, acceptance is the path to full recovery. From the first days “float” the thought, “I can accept this outcome and move on”.

Self care or self help is a way to start and accelerate your recovery from the heart break of a broken relationship. Taking care of your physical and emotional self along with starting to accept your loss are the first steps on the path to feeling better.

Be active in helping your self. Be well.

Dr. Lebo is a licensed psychologist who has been practicing for twenty years. He can be reached by email at drlebo@selfhelpinsight.com. You can also visit the selfhelpinsight.com website for additional information on recovering from a lost love and heart break.

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Can I Get Back Together With An Ex Regardless Of The Situation

March 11th, 2010 Jeanette No comments

If you have been through a breakup recently, there is a good chance that your life has gone through a tailspin. There is a lot of information out there about getting over your ex, but what happens when you realize that you keep wondering, “Can I get back together with an ex?” The truth is that when a lot of breakups happen, even if you were the one who thought you wanted the break up at the time, there are alternatives!

When we get angry or when we are disappointed, there is a good chance that we will say things that we don’t mean. Take some time and think about what created the breakup, and particularly, what kind of emotions were involved. What was going on at the time, and have those feelings or those emotions changed since the end of the relationship? The more reflection that you do, the better off you are going to be.

If you are wondering how to get back together with your ex, you will find that your first step is going to be examining your own feelings. Do you want to get back together with your ex because you genuinely love them and because you miss the life that you had together? Those are two good reasons to get back together with someone, but remember that simply missing a routine or missing the convenience is not! Take some time to be sure about what you want and why you want it!

If you have decided that you want your ex back after all, take some time and open up communication channels with them again. There are many different options to think about when you are looking towards getting back together, so make sure that you get a hold of them as soon as possible. While you should not be pushy, remember that you may be dealing with things that were said in anger during the breakup, and be gentle.

Remember that you should know what changes need to take place so that you don’t end up breaking up again. There are many things that might have caused you to break up in the first place, and you will find that unless you can work those out, and work them out permanently that you might just be looking at a repeat of the past. Don’t walk down the same path over and over again; find a way to make sure that you are both heading in the right direction.

When you want to make sure that you are going to get the relationship that you want, take some time to think about whether it was the one that you just left! If you are asking yourself “Can I get back together with my ex ,” it’s time to really consider what that relationship meant to you, and to start trying to get it going again. Don’t let what might be a truly positive aspect of your life get away from you just because you don’t have the heart to go after it.

To get back together with an ex, it is important to avoid the top 10 breakup mistakes. Discover what these 10 breakup mistakes are by clicking the link below. Get Ex Back Mistakes

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How to Make a Woman Fall in Love with You

March 10th, 2010 Jeanette No comments

We all want to be adored. Wouldn’t it be great to have a gorgeous girl gazing at you lovingly, listening to you with rapt attention, and leaning in for yet another kiss?

Well, you can have.

Getting a woman to fall for you is not as hard as it may seem. It doesn’t require expensive gifts, extravagant gestures or rock hard abs. In fact, all it requires is a little charm and a few good manners – and I’m about to explain exactly how to develop them.

Self-conscious men have a habit of putting women on pedestals. To some extent, this can work in your favor; there’s no better way of getting a girl to like you than showing that you like her. But if you’ve managed to convince yourself that every hot chick you see is too pretty to pay any attention to you, it’s time to do some re-thinking.

Start by reminding yourself that most single girls are looking for love. This means that no matter how you see yourself, she sees you as an available male – and she is not going to reject you unless you give her good reason to.

Remember also that girls are just as nervous as guys are. She might seem like a goddess to you, but when a girl looks in the mirror all she sees are her flaws. She is just as anxious about her appearance and just as nervous about making conversation as any man could be.

Girls want to impress you. They want you to like them. They want to feel sexy. All you need to know is a few simple tricks for getting and keeping their attention.

Start by making sure you look the part. Keep yourself clean and well groomed. Wear smart clothes which suit you. Stand up straight with your shoulders back and your head held high. Take pride in your appearance and develop a confident stance and you will instantly seem more attractive.

Don’t be afraid to approach women. Making eye contact and smiling over at her are a good start but, as very few women are prepared to make the first move, if you want something to happen you’re going to have to go over and introduce yourself. It may seem daunting at first, but remember that chicks find attention flattering – offer her a drink and she will take the time to respond.

When you get talking, listen to what she’s saying and ask leading questions. Girls are so used to men speaking to their chest that if you can maintain eye contact and show an interest in her opinions she will be thrilled to have met you.

When you talk about yourself, be confident without bragging. Don’t boast about your achievements and never bemoan your bad luck. Instead, talk passionately about your hobbies and interests or switch the topic of conversation back to her by paying her genuine compliments.

Do bear in mind that every man she speaks to will be telling her she’s hot. Make your compliments stand out by tailoring them to fit. Admire her quirky outfit, her tinkling laugh or her incredible stories – figure out what’s unique about her, then tell her why it’s great.

Take the time to get to know her properly. If you come on strong early on you may appear to be either needy or sleazy, so don’t put her under sexual pressure. By letting her control the pace you will make her feel respected, appreciated and more able to trust you. And the more she trusts you, the more into you that girl is going to be.

Want to learn 50 WAYS for approaching, attracting and seducing women? If so, take a look at Scott Patterson’s Free eBook which provides 50 tips for instant dating success.

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